Like all of us at one time or another, I found myself sitting at the crossroad of a potential decision, recently.
Days of thinking "What should I do?" The "fork" that was each road, trying to woo me over to their path. It was gut-wrenching at times, believing I needed to "do something."
After a couple of days went by, a teaching came to me that I had heard at some point over the past 6 months. I can't recall the source, what I did recall was this, "Why do you have to do anything?"
Ahhhhh! So you mean there's a "third road option?"
So often, especially in the "heat of the moment" we feel like we need to "do something." Make a decision and put it into action. Unfortunately, many of us do this when we are still "fired up" and in no shape to really make a good, solid decision.
Once I realized I had a third choice, I became even more intentional. I already knew not to say or do anything while I was upset. In fact, for the first time in my life, I am finding that I there are more and more occurrences where I have nothing to say and for those of you that have known me for a long time, that's saying A LOT!
I'm not kidding. I have been rendered speechless several times over the past few months. It's as shocking to me as it may be to you. I find that I am at a complete loss for words and the precursor to that? A loss of knowing what to do. The antidote? Space.
I found with the most recent thing I was pondering, that the two roads in front of me just didn't seem right. That in all honesty, no road seemed right. Enter my "third road option." I realized that I didn't have to do anything. Nothing WAS an option. Nothing WAS something. So nothing was the road I chose. And for now, nothing is where I wish to stay.
Do I believe upsets being resolved is ideal? Yes. I'm all for a conversation that can potentially "clear the air", even a bit but I also believe that in doing nothing, sometimes things can resolve themselves. I'm not talking some magical resolution born of complacency, I have been anything but complacent. But why can't the issue take care of itself because someone decides to begin a conversation? Someone decides to let it go? Someone decides to apologize? Someone has a change of mind or heart? The possibilities are endless my friends, endless on this so-called road of non-doing.
Next time you find yourself knee-deep in a dilemma, standing tall or weeping on the ground at the crossroad wondering "What shall I do?" Remember two things. One, that there is a "third road option" and two that it's liberating to just allow things to be so space is made and wisdom is given the chance to reveal itself to all parties involved.
I'm finding that there are times in life where doing "nothing" proves more powerful than doing something. I hope you find the same.