This...Is Not Me

April 16, 2017

 

This…is not me. I promise you that. Contrary to what some may think, I still get upset, feel sad, put my foot in my mouth, crave and desire, want and cling, in other words, I’m still like many of you. The only difference might be that because of my Mindfulness and meditation practices, I’m not as “married” to the things I think anymore.

 

“Retro Jenn” would have thought something and then got taken for a ride by that something. My mind would think “I’m upset about what he said to me.” And off we would go, my mind and I. #goodtimes

 

Away we went, thinking about the dude and what he said for hours, days, weeks, maybe even months after the fact. Same with things most would perceive as “good”, my mind would be all like “Oh my gosh! Only 3 sleeps ‘til vacation! Holy crap that ROCKS! Woo Hoo!” Only to have it “shift gears” not long after my arrival, causing profound disappointment with each passing day that drew me closer to returning to the “real world.”

 

Sweet, frantic way to live, right?

 

Yea, not for me, at least not anymore. Enter Mindfulness. Enter mediation. Enter some level of freedom from the mind that was making me nuts. Being Mindful is not about being “Zen’d out”, lacking passion, opinion or preference, quite the opposite. Mindfulness is about putting ME back in the driver’s seat of this bus called LIFE, a seat that I have deemed as one of more peace, for myself as well as those around me.

 

That peace presents itself in many ways but the easiest to share is that it presents itself in the form of more space between what I see/hear and what I say/do. Here my friends are where authenticity and true wisdom lie. When I get there, if I do and my odds are increasing, I haven’t a doubt, THIS is where my best self, resides. I can feel it in my bones.

 

I hope those of you who tend to follow me a bit see me as an advocate for YOU experiencing more peace in your life because that really is, all I’m trying to do. Live my best life, the best I can at any given moment and pass on what’s worked for me. #thatsallfolks

 

If I actually do ever attain this gal’s state of “blissed-out nirvana”, I probably will be off on an isolated island somewhere, far, far away from the Internet.

 

But know this to be true…
I’m workin’ on it. ;)

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