What a week! What a total roller coaster ride!
Last Wednesday I got some less than stellar news, Saturday "The Serendipitous Soul" got one of it's most lucrative contracts with a very prestigious organization and Tuesday, I was speeding back down screaming and feeling like I was going to fall out of my seat!
In the midst of all of this "frantic fun", I was given the opportunity (as we all are) to react or respond. To just freak out or choose anything different. In the tradition of my being nothing but truthful here in my blog, I was more in the "react mode" with the first announcement of wonky news than I would have liked to have been but in the end, I learned a lot about myself.
What's funny is how much I WAS "in the driver's seat" on the second downturn. I was fully conscious that I could potentially be walking into a distressing situation so I meditated right before the info was delivered. Next, when the news was actually being shared, I was open and listening, very centered, but near the end, as the info pile increased, I found myself feeling uneasy and ultimately, hung up a little shell-shocked.
So what did I do? Try nothing. As soon as I realized that I had a decent amount of emotions going on, I knew immediately that it wouldn't be the time to take any sort of action. That I needed space to digest, sort, talk to a trusted friend and come to terms, ultimately building a relationship with what I was given.
I also was reminded of this Zen proverb. "Let go or be dragged." It's so true. I have been called recently to let go of many things, the past, what I thought was going to happen, who I thought I would be doing things with, when things were going to happen, you name it! I also knew that if I continued to hold on in any of these areas, I was the only person who would be suffering the "rope burns" that come with not letting go.
Life is continuing to lead me home but it's clear - there will be no direct route for this girl.
Bunny trails and roller coaster rides. You can sit back and curse the fates or make a conscious decision to explore "the trails" and enjoy the ride.
The choice is clear to me...
Buckle up, Baby. <3