I'm sure many of you have seen or heard the saying "It costs nothing to be nice", right? And in some cases, it doesn't and in others it does. In fact, it can cost A LOT if you're not careful when the opportunity to do so, to "be nice" first presents itself.
These days, particularly when I am asked a favor I don't immediately say "yes", which is how I operated, especially out of the workspace for a very long time. Today, I stop and ask myself a very important question.
"Will me saying 'yes' to this person get me into something I know I would be doing with resentment or a dis-ease in attitude attached?"
If my answer isn't a clear NO, it's a "no" on my end and as much as I may have to disappoint someone, I would rather say no, knowing, in the end, I'm keeping both of our best interests at heart then saying yes, heading into something harboring some less than stellar feelings.
Quick example, you are asked to help out in a volunteer position, you really don't want to take but you say yes. Not only will you more than likely dread the day you have to do this thing, thinking about it for the days leading up, you will probably (as much as you might self-talk your way around it) not have the best attitude going into the day. So nice CAN cost. This might not prove to be a huge expense in that department but it still costs you some piece of mind. Why not volunteer in areas that light you up instead? Then nice does cost nothing. Get me?
Boundaries are a beautiful thing when designed to keep both parties "safe", this way of thinking does just that.
Trust me, nice can get very, very expensive, putting you into some serious "emotional debt", ask any worn-out people pleaser or peacemaker.
For all our sake, take time to discern what you are presented.
Keep nice free, my friends.